Trust Me, He Cannot Handle it Himself!

By Lucas Expensive

 

More often than not, the idea that men can handle all their issues alone, without the help of others, persists in everyone’s mind. The thought of vulnerability is something most men feel they cannot afford, as evidenced by statements like “Men should not cry” or “Men should not show weakness.” Many of us have witnessed situations where younger boys are told, “Don’t you know you’re a man?”

 

At such a young age, boys are taught to suppress their emotions and limit how often they seek help. This upbringing has contributed to a society filled with men who are too afraid to seek help, choosing instead to suffer in silence rather than express what is perceived as weakness.

 

The Importance of Community
A Nigerian proverb goes something along the lines of “A single broomstick can be broken easily, but a bundle of broomsticks is unbreakable.” This simple yet powerful saying encapsulates the essence of community: unity makes us stronger and more resilient in the face of challenges. No one is an island—we are all shaped by the people and environments around us. As a society, it is crucial to come together to create more communities that support men.

 

How Do We Create More Communities for Men?

  1. Destigmatize Seeking Help

The first step is to unlearn the notion that asking for help is a sign of weakness. In reality, being vulnerable is a sign of strength, it takes a great deal of courage! If you are a man, it’s important to understand that seeking help is not shameful but empowering.

2. Be the Safe Space

While building a community is not a one-person task, it often starts with one person taking the initiative. Strive to be the safe space you wish to see, for your friends, colleagues, gym buddies, or members of your local clubs. A small act of openness can spark a ripple effect in creating a supportive environment.

3. Leverage the Internet

The internet is arguably the most influential tool in today’s world. Platforms like Google, Instagram, Twitter, and even ChatGPT are our best friends now. It is important that this is leveraged to build a safe online positive community for men. This approach achieves two goals: it helps reach more people and normalizes seeking help.

Remember that building a community is a process that takes a lot of effort and time and has no guaranteed manual. However, by taking baby steps together we can make a change!

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